Alright y'all... so have you heard of the Spank the Monkey contest? It was a contest about... well spanking your monkey!

I've been quite addicted to reading all the entries this week and I found one callled Wanksicle by prettyflour where vamp Jasper was giving Edward tips on how to pleasure his human without killing her and I found it to be absolutely hilarious.

Jasper, of course, is sick of the never ending  lust and sexual tension/frustration coming off of Bella and Edward all the time. He has a talk with Edward about his experiences and basically tells his brother about the joys of pleasuring yourself, which E never does.

Then you get a sexy Jasper self-loving scene and you even get some mutual self-loving from Edward and Bella!

I loved it a lot and you might too! Don't forget to leave a review after reading, because well, that's what this whole pimping thing is all about!

Be back next week, same time, same place, same sexy Jasper!

Peace out lovies!
JasperLuver48