Have you had your fill of awesome contests yet? Yeah, didn't think so. There can never be too many contests. *fist pumps for contests*

This week, I'm gonna talk about two really fun contests that are coming up and I KNOW the entries will be complete awesomesauce.

Have you ever read a story that had a kid in it? A kid so adorable and sweet and well-mannered that it made you wanna go hump someone in order to make your own little bundle of joy? Well, this ain't the contest for that. *snickers* The Problem Child Contest wants, well, problem children.


Aw, ain't he cute?

Kids who are spoiled rotten assholes, kids who steal money from their parents' wallet, teenagers who run away to marry a twice divorced 39-year-old biker nick-named Knuckles, toddlers who throws a tantrum in the middle of a fancy restaurant and purposely piss themselves to embarrass you... you get the idea. I wanna see some bad ass kids. I wanna laugh my ass off and thank Grilled Cheese Jesus that the bad fuckers aren't mine. Viva la problem children!

This next contest is sure to be all kinds of fun. The School's Out For Summer Contest wants stories that feature summer vacation. But not just any summer vacation...



Need I say more?

Didn't think so.